I kicked Sheesha and leaned against her harness. She spun around and raced away from the monastery. I looked over my shoulder at the three monks that approached. Freya jumped up and kicked the lead monk in the throat. Chastity ran towards the road with terror in her eyes. The second monk flew through the air and kicked Grundy in the chest. Grundy grunted and wrapped his arms around the monk’s waist. Jenna sat in the dirt. She shook her head and started to run away. The third monk raced toward her, faster than she could escape. The Goblinizer hummed in my hand. I brought Sheesha back around and raced to block the monk before he hit Jenna. The monk flipped and tumbled through the grass. Jenna looked up in time to see him bearing down on her in a blur. I jumped from Sheesha’s back.

The Goblinizer lead the way as I flew toward the monk. The tip of the blade struck his shoulder. He hit me square in the nose. I heard a crunch inside my head. My eyes watered from the blow. I pulled down and felt the magical knife slice through his ribs. He collapsed on the ground with a sigh. I slid the knife from his belly and tried to wipe the blade off on my leg. The Goblinizer twisted in my hand as I wiped it across my thigh. I gasped as the edge cut a thin line into my leg.

“Ouch,” I said, "Jenna, it's the dragon! run!!" I stuffed the dagger in my belt and whistled through my broken tooth for Sheesha. She sprang through the grass. I blinked the tears out of my eyes and climbed on her back. I kicked and rode her away from the monastery as fast as she could run.

When I got to the road I dared to look back. The dragon no longer watched us. Her scaly neck was extended up over the fence. Her mouth was stretched open. A stream of steaming black liquid poured from a window on the top floor of Tang’s library and into her open mouth. Jenna, Freya, and Grundy burst from the grass and onto the road.

"Run!" Freya said.

We ran as fast as we could from the monastery. When we could run no more, we staggered off the road and made a small camp. Freya pulled a pot from a bag. I started to build a fire.

“We fell apart back there.” She said. She didn't look at any of us. “You call that discipline? At the first sign of trouble, everyone turned and ran.”

"You said run!" I said.

"Before that!" she said "We needed to be together back there, some of us cant run as fast as others"

“Leave em alone, Freya, the dragon scared em is all,” Grundy said.

She stood and faced us. “And where is Drexel?” She kicked the cooking pot, sending it high into the air. We all ducked. It landed with a clang behind Grundy. Freya retrieved the pan and cooked a dinner of stewed grass.

It tasted about as good as stewed grass can. Only Sheesha ate her portion with enthusiasm. We all swallowed it stoically until it was gone. Even Grundy took his time. When she was finished eating, Freya looked up.

“I would appreciate it if nobody spread the word that I kicked my pot,” she said, "It is a sacred object". We eagerly agreed to keep quiet.

“So now we go to Barry’s?” Chastity asked.

“First thing in the morning,” Freya said. Her arm was covered with hard scabs. Chastity didn't argue, we were all utterly exhausted.

Jenna sat behind Grundy and cleaned his wound. He winced as she scrubbed the day’s dust from the gouge in his back. Sheesha barked and looked up. A black dot appeared in the sky. It zipped back and forth and slowly got bigger. A whine filled the air. Drexel and his giant stenchfly landed by our camp and kicked up a cloud of dust.

“Help me,” Drexel said in a nasal voice. The fly shrank into the amulet. Drexel hung it around his neck. He walked to the fire and helped himself to the last of what we were eating.

“It’s not so bad once you get the hang of it,” he said. He patted his amulet. Nobody looked at him.

“Easy there,” Grundy said. Jenna scrubbed his back harder. She didn’t look at Drexel. I petted Sheesha. Freya cleaned her pot. Chastity stared into the grass. Drexel straightened his cloak and smoothed back his hair.

“I circled back,” he said. He sat by the fire. “ I watched the monestary from afar for a while. The dragon was just sitting there being spoon fed by Tang, its downright eerie. The good news is, the monks didn’t seem too interested in following us. They were all in there, circled around the dragon, running around. No damage to the wall anywhere. Falstaag definetely didn't follow through with his assault. ”

Jenna continued scrubbing Grundy’s back. Chastity looked into the grass. Drexel lay back.

"This is incredibly disturbing" Freya said. "What could it be doing in there?"

"Eatin babies" Grundy said.

"Yes, but why?" Freya wondered.

“I guess we’re off to Barry’s tomorrow?” Drexel asked.

“That’s right,” Chastity said without looking up. Freya put her cooking gear in her bag and lay with her back to Drexel. I lay against Sheesha. She stank. But then, so did I. I felt hollow inside, except where I felt rage.

“What’s with everybody?” Drexel asked.

Grundy snored. I thought about Tang until I went to sleep.

The next morning we got up early. The sun was just coming over the horizon. We didn’t eat. We trudged along the road to Barry’s. In the distance were wooden catapults on wheels.

“Those look like they could be Falstaag’s,” Jenna said.

“It doesn’t look like there is anyone up there,” Freya said., "If there are, I'll try to find out what happened to Falstaag". We approached warily. There were two catapults and a battering ram which sat on six wooden wheels, each taller than me. A tarp was strung between the machines. Three filthy town guards sat under the tarp, in the shade. They played cards.

One of the guards looked up when we approached.

"Hail, guards" Freya said, "I wish to turn myself in"

“Looks like we got suspects.” He smirked and threw up his hands. Another guard looked at us and back at the others.

“Looks like they’re getting away,” he said.

That brought a few chuckles from his companions. We stopped and took in the scene. Freya took a couple of steps toward the guards. They stopped smiling. Their hands went to their swords. One reached behind the crate he sat on and pulled a bow into view.

“I’m not looking for a fight.” Freya held her hands above her head.

“We need to speak with Falstaag. Is he here?” She asked.

That brought new smirks to their faces.

“Check town. He probably needs a drinking buddy right now.” A guard said.

“Right.” Freya backed away. They lowered their weapons. One tipped his helmet.

“Good luck, Iron Sex,” he said. Freya’s muscles tensed.

“She’s wanted all right.” The guard on the crate said, bursting into laughter. The leader cast a final lewd glance at Freya before belching and returning to his card game.

Freya walked back to us and frowned.

“Let’s get to Barry’s,” she said.

We gave Falstaag’s men a wide berth. They laughed wickedly at a joke we couldn’t hear. We followed the road to Barry’s.

“There’s a lot of Falstaag’s gear lying around,” Grundy said.

“Those guards didn’t seem too worried about it,” Drexel said.

“They looked disgusting,” Chastity said.

“Something very bad is going on here. I wish the dragon hadn't seen us. We should have gone right to Barry’s,” Freya said.

“Thank you,” Chastity said. She flipped her hair back.

“If you could just explain to Drexel the importance of sticking together, we’ll be in much better shape,” Jenna said. Grundy grunted in agreement.

“I’m glad to see we’re all enjoying ourselves,” Drexel said.

The road took a lazy turn. As we rounded the slow curve, Barry’s estate appeared in the distance. A cloud of dust crept over the plains and toward us. Figures appeared in the dust. A party was riding toward us.

“We don’t have time to hide,” Grundy said.

“There’s always time to hide,” Drexel said. He dove into the grass and crawled away from the road. The pounding of hooves became audible. I made out the shape of Barry’s fur cloak atop the lead horse. Next to him was the blonde-haired leader of his guard. The riders approached.

“If it isn’t the Twaddle Six!” Barry’s voice rang out as they neared.

“Hello, hello! How long has it been? Barry was getting worried about you,” he said. He pulled the reins and his horse halted in front of us. His entourage of guards in well-crafted, form-fitting leather armor sat atop their horses like statues. Yanter, the head guard held his chin just a little higher than the rest. The young girl we’d seen before sat in front of him on his horse. He patted her head. “How fabulous is this? The Twaddle Six returning just in time for a big party at Barry’s,” he said.

I looked at Freya. She looked as confused as I was.

“Freya, or should I say Iron Sex, its great to see you!" Barry said. Freya's eyes lit up with anger and surprise.

And Mr. Drexel crawling around in perfect form I see.” He glanced at the grass where Drexel had hidden. Drexel stood with a scowl.

“It looks like everyone is here for the party. Except, hmmm...I don’t see Satyrio?” Barry looked left and then right. “I see a thick little man.” He looked at Grundy. “A dwarf in our gang, how colorful is that?” He asked his men. They nodded. “So, is it the Twaddle Seven now? Is that little manimal scaring up some fun somewhere?” Barry asked.

“Reese died,” Chastity said. Barry gasped.

“A hero’s death. Now how tragic is that?” Barry said. “Let’s discuss this all over dinner.”

“You’ll be a fine replacement for Satyrio.” Barry said to Grundy. Barry turned to the pimply faced lieutenant next to him. “Shickle, make sure Shamston gets a look at this one. I want him carved up right away,” Barry said. “You’ll make a fine statue.” He winked at Grundy.

Shickle snapped his fingers. One of the guards rode up from the rear with a wagon led by two horses. Their tails were tied into little balls and their ears were cropped into two tiny triangles atop their heads. Their manicured manes flowed like waves down their necks. The wagon was painted across the side in magnificent colors. The painting showed Cloda singing in a heroic pose with bodies heaped at her feet.

“Twaddle Six, you can ride in Cloda’s last stand.” Barry motioned to the wagon. We boarded and sat back. The leather cushioned seats were the softest thing I’d felt since we left Barry’s. The wagon jolted and we rode to Barry’s.

“This I like,” Grundy said. "Great Cloda painting on the side, too!" Freya frowned.

"Why did Barry call me 'Iron Sex', like those repugnant guards?" Freya asked, adjusting her leather wrap. Nobody replied.

We passed through the gates to Barry’s. The long yard was filled with bards and singers, as usual. There were shouts as groups of people in colorful clothes batted giant balloons into the air. The enormous balls were painted in bright colors. Just as a balloon was about to touch the ground, someone would kick it high into the air.

“What are those?” I asked

“They’re bladders,” Grundy said. “I used to blow up the bladders of Gilmic pigs for the kids to play with. Those must be from those giant Gilmics,” he said.

“It’s the Twaddle Six.” A shout went up. Everyone stopped what they were doing, and approached. The giant pig bladders bounced gently off the ground. A juggler dropped his balls and ran toward our wagon. Shickle and the guards formed around us and kept the people at bay. Arms desperately reached past the guards. Sheesha began to bark at the hordes of people who shouted at us. Shickle blew a horn and more guards came from Barry’s main building. They joined the escort and pushed the people back.

“Give the heroes some room to breathe,” Barry said. The wagon continued through the grounds. We reached a gate. The guesthouse was on the other side. The guards kept the fans behind us. Our wagon passed through. We were in the inner compound, where we had stayed before.

“I saw one of them! I saw Telley Smell-Me!” A voice rose above the throng.

“Iron Sex! Iron Sex! Iron Sex!” The crowd began to chant. Trumpets blew.

“Excellent!” Barry said. “Freshen up for the feast people. We’re going to have a great party!”

We stumbled out of the coach and into a guest house. Barry glanced over his shoulder at us. His smoked glasses glinted in the sunlight, his gold necklace brilliantly shone from under his white fur vest. His cape hung off his back.

“Barry wants to hear all about your little adventures,” he said. He rode toward his house.

“What's with the people crowding around us like this? I’m confused,” Drexel said.

“What else is new?” Jenna asked.

“At least I know when not to blow things up,” Drexel said.

“That’s because you don’t know anything but running,” Jenna said.

“Enough.” Freya dropped her gear on the floor. “This is not the time for bickering.” She sat on one of the beds. “I suggest we figure out what is going on around here. I’m starting to wonder about Barry.”

“What do you mean?” Chastity asked.

“Iron Sex? What in the world is he doing? Something doesn’t feel right about all of this,” Freya said. “He met us at his road. How did he know we were coming?” She asked.

“Maybe he has lookouts,” Chastity said.

“I didn’t see any,” Grundy said.

"Maybe he was heading somewhere else" I said.

"Well I for one am glad to finally be back in the lap of luxury, where I belong." Chastity said, she pulled Reese’s belt buckle from her back. She wiped it clean and polished it on her sleeve until the buckle glittered.

“In memory of our lost friend,” she said. She placed the buckle on a shelf.

“If Reese could not make it back to Barry’s, he can be here in spirit,” she said. We looked at the buckle silently. Freya looked particularly upset. She sat on a bed and looked up at the buckle.

“It wasn’t anybody’s fault,” I said. She looked at me.

“Let’s get cleaned up,” she said.

In the back room were basins of water, soap, perfumes, and fine towels. We each took a few minutes to scrub the grime of Lengnil's tomb and days of Twaddle dust off our bodies. I wiped Sheesha down. By the time we were done, the water in each basin was black. Drexel smoothed his hair back and looked around. He squatted outside the door to our cottage.

“What are you doing?” I asked.

“Just a little security,” he said. He winked. “You might want to steer clear of this.” He lay a thin wire across our doorstep. On one end was a small knife. He smiled and walked back into the cottage. “Be sure not to trip that wire.” He told us. He shut the door. Just then, someone knocked. Drexel rolled his eyes and opened the door. The little girl who had been with Barry stood in the doorway. Drexel stood there too, keeping her safe from the trap. She wore leather shorts and a pink silk shirt.

“Barry said it’s dinner time,” she said in a low voice.

“Speak up, child,” Grundy said.

“Barry’s hungry.” She mumbled. She turned and skipped toward the main house.

We left our things in the room. Drexel checked the trap one more time and we made our way into the main dining room of Barry’s estate. The girl escorted us into a cavernous room lined with painted tapestries. Unlike Falstaag’s, these tapestries depicted scenes of bards singing before huge audiences. On one tapestry, Cloda sang to a mass of thousands. Beside each tapestry, marble columns rose up from the floor and supported a vaulted ceiling from which glowing crystal chandeliers hung. The sounds of bustling waiters echoed throughout the vast chamber. We each took our places in plush, high-backed chairs carved from giant bones. Chastity grinned ecstatically.

“Barry knows how to put on a feast,” she said.

Drexel nodded in agreement and reached for a crystal decanter of wine. The little girl sat at the foot of the table. I took my place across from Freya. The smells of roasting meats wafted from the back, and a quartet of musicians played on stringed instruments. Sheesha lay at my feet and panted. Wine was poured in our goblets and bread set before us. Once we’d settled in, the room quieted. The musicians stopped their strumming. The waiters stood at attention behind each of our chairs. The head waiter, or at least the waiter dressed in the most gold and silk stood behind the empty red velvet chair at the head of the table.

“This is some spread,” Grundy said.

“Ladies and Gentleman, Barry Gorgon.” A voice from the back of the room announced. A padded mallet struck a gong as big as a giant gilmic.

As the vibration of the gong faded, the room became utterly silent. I looked at Freya. She sat still, her mouth frozen in a half-smirk. Footsteps echoed and reverberated through the hall. Barry appeared in the front of the room. He waltzed down the aisle. He wore a green silk gown with blue fur fringe. His clothes rustled rhythmically as he sashayed from left to right, dancing with an imaginary partner on his way to his seat. He twirled twice and then he bowed before us. He looked up from his bow, still bent over and stared me dead in the eyes.

He paused for a second and then his eyes drifted to Drexel on my right, and then to Freya. He looked each of us in the eyes for a second. The waiters gripped the backs of our chairs so hard their knuckles were white. Their lips stretched tightly across their faces in nervous, big smiles. Barry stood up straight and stepped away from his chair. He pulled a handkerchief from his pocket and wiped a bead of sweat from the temple of the head waiter. He dropped the handkerchief on the ground and snapped his fingers.

“What is this, a funeral?” He said.

The musicians struck up a song and the waiters relaxed. Barry’s chair was pulled back and he sunk into the red velvet cushion. His gown was open to his navel. A gold amulet sparkled.

“Tell me, Telle! How have you enjoyed being a member of the Twaddle Six?”

“It’s been fine Barry. I’m looking forward to killing more smoogers,” I said.

“Of course you are,” he said. He turned to my left. “And you, Drexel? How have you been faring?” He asked.

“More wine and I’ll be just fine.” Drexel poured himself another glass and emptied the decanter.

“A man after my own heart,” Barry said. “Iron Sex? All is well I presume?” He asked. Freya frowned.

“Stop calling me that. I have many questions.,” she said.

“Great, Great, I see Chastity here is looking fabulous.” He reached across the table and brushed her cheek.

“Have I ever told you how truly ravishing you look?” He asked.

“You must have Barry,” Chastity said. She smiled.

“Fantastic,” he said. He let his hand drop and looked at Jenna.

“My favorite cherub of a bookworm. I trust you’re doing well,” he said. He patted her head. “And you’ve traded the Satyr for a dwarf. I guess the Twaddle Six was short a member,” he said. He laughed through his nose at his own joke. He winked at me. Then he looked at Jenna. “Short several I’d say,” he said. The waiters laughed loudly.

Grundy grunted and gnawed on a leg of roast beast.

"Barry you will answer my questions." Freya said, "First of all, why are you calling me that repugnant name?"

Barry roled his eyes, "Please, Freya, it's just show business,"he droned, "You do your job and let me do mine."

"What does your job have to do with this insult?" Freya asked.

"I've already been promoting your heroic exploits to the locals," He said, "Of course I had to make some changes to make everybody seem more... heroic! You saw what I did with Satyrio...I've got new outfits and images for everybody! Where's your little costume, Iron Sex? The leather wrap is hot, hot, hot to be sure, but I thought you could use more color."

"I will not wear that mockery you sent." Freya said, glaring, "Furthermore, you will immediately stop referring to me by that name."

"Oh, have it your way" Barry sighed, "But believe me, sex sells."

"Freya, leave the man alone" Jenna said, "He's looking out for our best interests"

“Fantastic." Barry said, " Now why don’t you all tell Barry what you’ve been up to. It’s been so long after all, Barry was getting worried".

We chewed through plate after plate of fish, fowl, and beast. Each heaping tray of food was better than the last. Between bites we told Barry about the goblins we’d killed, and of our suspicions concerning their possible alliance with Falstaag.

“Fascinating. So you think Falstaag works with the smoogers?” Barry asked.

“We also found some other smoogers, in a place called Town. They…” My shin exploded in pain. I looked across the table to see Freya glaring at me. She really knew how to kick.

“What’s that, Telle?” Barry looked at me. “I was saying that we need to go to town,” I said. Barry squinted.

“Is there something you’re not telling Barry?” He picked a piece of braised gilmic pig from between his front teeth with the point of a long knife.

“No. Not much to tell really,” I said. He looked at me and sucked at his teeth. He put the knife down.

“Perhaps you could answer something else,” Freya said. Barry glanced at Freya.

“Ask Barry anything,” he said.

“How did you know we were coming?” She asked.

“You're the Twaddle Six, what kind of host would I be if I wasn't ready to accommodate you,” Barry said. He smiled. He picked another dumpling off a plate and popped it into his mouth.

“So, what’s next for our intrepid heroes, then?” Barry asked with a full mouth.

“We've got trouble with Tang,” I said.

“He's got a dragon at his house" Chastity said, "But we found a really powerful..OW!" Chastity winced, then glared at Freya.

“Barry knows about the nasty dragon." Barry confided," Lovely Old Orka" His face lit up. He clapped his hands and said, "why don’t you take care of her? The Twaddle Six would surely be legendary!”

“Are you trying to get us killed?” Drexel spit out his wine.

“Of course not!” he said. “Barry is trying to keep you alive.” He passed a plate of four-legged fish to Grundy. “Barry has done quite a bit of work to increase your reputation around here,” Barry said. “But taking care of that ancient awful thing is all you would need to do to reach the level of fame we are striving for...”

Drexel dropped his fork. Even Grundy stopped eating. Only Sheesha kept gnawing on the bone I’d dropped under the table for her.

“Let Barry explain,” Barry said. He reached for a dumpling and popped it in his mouth. We all sat in silence while the slowly chewed. He clapped his hands in a quick rhythm, and the waiters filed out of the room. He took a sip of wine. He swished it around his mouth and then swallowed.

“Barry has been working very hard to make you people heroes." He said, "Barry has writers who make songs for the local entertainment to sing. We'll write stories about you. Jugglers, magicians, every entertainer around is telling the world about this fabulous group of adventurers. The first hand-carved, limited edition, Twaddle Six dolls are heading to Heedon Springs to be sold, even as we speak. Every shop. You people will be big.” He winked at me again,“Figuratively speaking, of course.

"But Barry can’t do everything by himself. He needs you to tell him every last thing you’ve been up to. The writers need the material” he said. He looked us over.

“Now how can you help Barry to help you?” He asked. Drexel just stared. Freya tensed. Chastity cleared her throat.

"You can convince Chastity to use the staff," Grundy said, "She's the only one of us who...OW! Freya was that you?"

Freya glared at everyone.

“Barry, I have a score to settle with Tang,” I said.

“Wonderful!” Barry’s eyes lit up. “How about the Twaddle Six take on Tang and then that pesky dragon. Now there’s something we can write about. Something the people can really sink their teeth into. What do you think about that, princess?” Barry asked the girl at the foot of the table.

“That sounds good,” she said.

“Then it’s decided,” he said.

“We did not agree to that!” Jenna exclaimed.

"Great" I said, "Are your guards ready for a fight? Do any of the entertainers here do that magic singing like Cloda did? Do you have any, gosh, uh, Anti-Dragon songs?"

"Nono, the lore would never stick," Barry said, "What kind of heroes would the Twaddle Six be if they needed to rely on my humble forces to defeat their enemies"

"But we'll never be able to..."

Jenna was cut off.

"tsk tsk, none of that. I have complete faith in your abilities! The matter is decided!"

"No it damn well isn't!" Jenna said, but by then Barry had jumped up from his chair and snapped his fingers. The waiters returned and cleared the dishes. Barry danced to the end of the table.

“Princess,” he said. He held out his hand. The little girl took it. Together they walked out of the room.

“That man!” Freya stammered, “This palace! The food is good, but other than that, this entire place is disgusting,” she said.

I was stuffed from the meal we’d eaten. My eyelids slid shut. My mind sloshed from the wine. The waiters returned and stood behind our chairs. I scooped up food and fed it to Sheesha. Then we were escorted out of Barry’s house.

“I hate how he evaded my questions,” Freya said.

Cheers and shouts went up from the yard. Camp fires were scattered across the grounds of Barry’s estate. Giant gilmic pig bladder balloons bounced from one group of partiers to another.

“Are all these people Cloda fans?” Grundy asked.

“They’re our fans now,” Chastity said. “Barry is good at what he does.”

“Maybe we should find out what he’s been saying about us,” Jenna said. We walked through the crowds. People patted us on the back and cheered us as we went by. Chastity joined a few people in dancing as we walked. They chanted our names, applauded us, gave us drinks, and showered us with little gifts and crafts.

“I don’t want to be out here,” Freya said. “Let’s get back.”

On our way back to the guesthouse, we passed a group around a fire. A dozen men and women sat on the ground in front of a thin man with bright green pants and a yellow shirt. He played a lute and sang. Wineskins passed from hand to hand and mouth to mouth.

“Hey they're singin Cloda songs, can we join em for a bit?,” Grundy asked.

Freya sighed as she took a seat next to two drunken boys. Grundy sat stone faced, but grooving along quietly. Drexel immediately got hold of a wineskin. Chastity quickly found the lap of a muscled off-duty guard and sat in it.

“It’s you.” A scruffy man next to me said. He grinned. It was Mendel, the kid who took us to Barry when we arrived in Heedon Springs. Mendel passed me a wineskin.

“I don’t think it’s a good idea,” I said. I passed it back.

“What can it hurt? It’s party time.” He pushed it back to me. I sighed and took a swig. The sour wine rushed down my throat. Mendel gave the skin a squeeze and a stream gushed into my belly. He grinned. The wine hit me and carried my mind away on a cloud. I sat back and swallowed a few more mouthfuls until the laughter and singing joined and became a dull throbbing in my ears.

Chastity flirted with her new friend. Grundy sat back and yawned. He took a swipe at a balloon that came floating down. His fist went right through the side. The colorful bladder deflated and draped over his head. I laughed. Drexel’s laughter sounded from behind. I relaxed and numbly enjoyed the scene. I swallowed more wine.

“If only Reesh could have been here for this,” I said. I thought of the slow, graceful fall that carried him to the stone floor of Lengnil's tomb. My eyes grew warm. I swallowed more wine and cried quietly.

My reverie was shattered by the words the bard in front sang.

“…with Satyrio I know!”, he sang.

I sat up and tried to focus on the singer. Two skinny, moustached stilt bards in yellow shirts wavered in front of me and then merged into one.

“He came from afar with his brave companions.

The son of the love between a woman and stallion.

A friend to the people, he could fight a battalion.

But his life would be lost in the tomb near the Kraken.

The song continued. When he finished, he took a bow. The others didn’t seem to notice. The song was barely audible over the din of the revelry. I stood and staggered toward the performer. I reached up and grabbed him by the neck. He looked down at me in surprise.

“I want to hear that song again, your tallness,” I said.

“Unhand me you creature,” he said. He pulled back. I tightened my grip. He looked down at me and the anger faded from his face as he recognized his captor.

“My goodness. It’s Telly Smelly! What an honor!”

“My name is Telle Shmellme,” I said. “And I want to hear that song again.”

“Of course. I’d be honored to arrange a private performance as soon as the song is finished,” he said. I pulled his head down to my ear. I leaned in and belched, tasting the wine in my mouth.

“Now,” I said. I looked at the others. Freya got slowly to her feet

"Whats is it, Telle?" She said.

Mendel looked confused. Frightened whispers spread.

“I've heard Smelly's got a terrible temper,” I heard someone say, “He’ll kill him.”

“We’re going,” I said. I squeezed the stilt’s neck and marched him, back to our quarters. He crouched the whole way.

"Get over here damnit!" I slurred, "We're havin' an interrerrgation!"

“He’s not a happy drunk.” Drexel told the crowd.

“Uh-oh,” Grundy said.